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December 03, 2012

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nick s

The von Mittelstadts of Neuburg-Dummkopfländ adding a bit of chin to the gene pool.

Perhaps that's why William was dispatched to St Andrews instead of Oxbridge.

Charlie W

You're incinerating that taxpayer funded privately provided assisted conception was used?

jamie

I incinerate NOTHING! I was tyhinking more of not natural in the sense of not conceiving in their own time, but yeah, a little assistance would make sense.

CMcM

I'm hoping it *is* a IVF assisted pregnancy resulting in multiple births - identical quins would do for me. So no one could track which one came out first and then they'd fall to squabbling over it throughout their childhood. Factions would form in the popular press. When they reach 18 we could put them in a Big Brother style house and expose their failings on prime time TV till Davina McCall crowned the last one to be voted off the programme. A Thoroughly Modern Monarchy for Modern Times, eh?

ajay

CMcM: sounds vaguely like "Kind Hearts and Coronets". Would all five be played by Alec Guinness?

(But an IVF-multiple wouldn't result in identical siblings; it happens because multiple zygotes get implanted during an IVF cycle, and a lot of the time more than one of them 'takes', as it were. Identicals happen when a zygote splits.)

CMcM

Ajay: that's the problem with folk like you: you turn up and take all the magic out of the world with your relentless literal rationalism. How is it even possible to discuss a subject like royalty if you do that sort of thing?

ajay

Ooh, get you, Bagehot-boy.

But you're right that a few rival claimants would do great things for the monarchy in these days of reality TV contests (and indeed Game of Thrones). Perhaps some of them could raise their standards in various depressed areas, assuming the tops don't fall off.

belle le triste

I'm a Plantagenet Get Me Out of Here

Richard J

The model of the Turkish seraglio works quite well here - immure the heirs in glorious seclusion until that fateful encounter with the velvet rope.

Strictly Come Strangling.

(That said, the title needs working on owing to unfortunate autoerotic implications.)

ajay

I'm a Plantagenet Get Me Out of Here

David Starkey is on the line, he sounds unhappy about the rebranding job you've done on his book about the Princes in the Tower.

CMcM

The Only Way is Saxe-Coberg-Gotha?

des von bladet

The Heiring Cupboard.

belle le triste

Come Reign with Me

Chris Williams

Primogeniture Suspect.

nathan

coronation st

bert

Add to the competitive element by having different fathers for the different claimants. Hewitt Do You Think You Are?

jamie

be kind of funny if the kid turns out to be a bit, well, ginger, wouldn't it?

Ken MacLeod

With any luck we can turn that Onion piece into a crisis for the special relationship. Bonus points for a US-flag-burning royalist riot in Grosvenor Square.

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